a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
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We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
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I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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