***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
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Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
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4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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