Already got asked if we're dating
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize