She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Why is there bacon in the couch?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
