what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
My bed smells like the plague
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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