At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
