The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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