She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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