He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
As shirtless as possible
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize
