You really coming over, don't trick.
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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