marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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