I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
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I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
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Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
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