is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
