i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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