Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
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Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
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It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
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