Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
my liver is dry heaving
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
