you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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