having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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