Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
