true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
This is the high leading the old right now
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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