he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.