What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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