What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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