I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
