Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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