So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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