We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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