ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Randomize
