i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize