ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
