I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
we're making bets on your personal life
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
