I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
