the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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