I got chris browned last night
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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