your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
