I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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