YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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