i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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