Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize