Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
