Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize