im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
