you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I just gift wrapped bread.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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