similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
