he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
cat food counts as protein by the way
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
