why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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