Yo dont text me then not text me
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
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