he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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