I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
