Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
